SwiftVets.com

[dmackto]

_________________
Deborah
The FROZEN CHICKEN Journal

This is no time for ease and comfort. It is the time to dare and endure.
- Winston Churchill

[ArmyMedicsMom]

"John Kerry says the 'W' in George W. Bush stands for 'Wrong.' But he still can't explain what John Kerry stands for." —David Letterman


"John Kerry keeping a low profile this week. He said he wanted to get away and go someplace where no one would expect to see him. So I guess he showed up at his old seat in the Senate. Nobody's going to look for him there." —Jay Leno

"You see the pictures in the paper today of John Kerry windsurfing? He's at his home in Nantucket this week, doing his favorite thing, windsurfing. Even his hobby depends on which way the wind blows." —Jay Leno

"The latest issue of GQ magazine, John Kerry talks about what a man should look for in a woman. GQ? If John Kerry is going to talk about what he likes in a woman, shouldn't it be in Fortune or Money magazine?" --Jay Leno

"Vice President Dick Cheney attacked John Kerry. He said that John Kerry 'lacks deeply held convictions.' Today Kerry shot back, he said, 'That's not completely true.'" —Jay Leno

"There was an embarrassing moment at a recent Democratic fundraiser. When John Kerry was handed a $10 million dollar check, he said, 'I do.'" —Craig Kilborn

"'Shrek 2' made over $120 million during its first week. In a related story, John Kerry asked Shrek to marry him." —Conan O'Brien

"John Kerry met with Ralph Nader last week. Both sides of every issue were discussed. And then, Nader spoke." —Jay Leno

"This is so weird. I saw the new John Kerry campaign commercial and he says, 'I'm John Kerry and I approve of this message — if I have one.'" —Craig Kilborn

"John Kerry and Ralph Nader met face-to-face, it was a historic meeting. Astronomers said today their meeting actually created what is called a 'charisma black hole.'" —Jay Leno

"President Bush said John Kerry is on both sides of every issue. And Kerry replied, 'No, I'm not ... but there is some truth to that.' " —Craig Kilborn

"John Kerry spent the day reading to preschoolers ... and the kids said Kerry actually lacked warmth and failed to articulate a clear message." —David Letterman

"Courtney Love said she once escorted Kerry to a concert. John Kerry once went out with Courtney Love and he's questioning Bush's judgment." —Jay Leno

"John Kerry announced his plan for how to handle those poor naked prisoners. His wife is going to buy them all a $1,000 Armani suit." —Craig Kilborn

"John Kerry fell off of his bicycle over the weekend. He went for a Sunday afternoon ride, fell off in front of the news media. Luckily, his hair broke the fall so it's not as serious. ... Thankfully, Senator Kerry was not seriously injured. In fact, when the police arrived, Kerry was well enough to give conflicting reports to the officers about what happened." —Jay Leno

"John Kerry accused President Bush of catering to the rich. You know, as opposed to John Kerry who just marries them." —Jay Leno

"John Kerry will undergo surgery to repair his right shoulder. He originally hurt it when he suddenly switched positions on Iraq." —Craig Kilborn

"We make jokes about it but the truth is this presidential election really offers us a choice of two well-informed opposing positions on every issue. OK, they both belong to John Kerry, but they're still there." —Jay Leno

"The Secret Service has announced it is doubling its protection for John Kerry. You can understand why — with two positions on every issue, he has twice as many people mad at him." —Jay Leno

"John Kerry described his Republican critics as 'the most crooked, lying group I've ever seen.' Now, that's saying something, because Kerry's both a lawyer and a politician." —Jay Leno


"Yesterday Senator John Kerry changed his mind and now supports the ban on gay marriages. I'm telling you this guy has more positions than Paris Hilton." —David Letterman

"According to a new study, Botox injections can help back pain. So you see, that's why John Kerry had all that Botox — his back was killing him from all that flip-flopping on issues." —Jay Leno

[Fort Campbell]

[Fort Campbell]

This one says it all.

[Stee]

Ta-reeza in a new political ad is shown crying outside a bathroom door, holding a purple heart, every time he takes a bath his ass swells because of the rice. John will carry his service in Vietnam the rest of his life..... fluff him with a fork....................

[kmudd]

this one could be funny if edited.

[no_1_momlandj]

ok I think I got it right this time

http://communistsforkerry.com/images/othersites/Kerry_headupbutt.jpg

[The Balloon Artist]

In honor of the now nearly forgotten debate

I'm on Both Sides Now

Boats and trips Cambodia
Rice crispies in my derrière
Earned 3 purple hearts if you care
I’ve looked at war that way
Now all they want to talk to about
The swifts vets tell on every one
So many things I’ve really done
Now they got in my way
I’ve looked at war from both sides now
From pro and con and still somehow
It’s war’s allusions I recall
I really don’t know war at all


Yeas and nays and senate votes
The dizzy crazy way you feel
And every liberal tale comes real
I’ve looked at votes that way
But now it's just another show
And leave ‘em wondering where'd you go?
Just say yes 'fore saying no
And never sign one eighty
I've looked at Votes from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
My vote decisions I recall
I really don't know votes at all


Tears and fears and feeling proud
To hear you’re not Bush from the crowd
Dreams and schemes and voter fraud
My campaigns run that way
Oh but now Jim Lehers looking strange
He shakes his head
My positions changed
Well something's lost but something's gained
In lying every day
I've looked at lies from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
My positions I can't recall
I really don't know lies at all
It's lie's delusions I recall
I really don't know lies
I really don't know lies at all
_________________
What about John Kerry's four months in Vietnam qualify him to be president?
Al Gore was there for five.

[Navy_Navy_Navy]

Bin Laden Deputy Thanks Kerry for 'Great Ideas'
by Scott Ott

(2004-10-01) -- In a tape aired on Al-Jazeera TV, Usama bin Laden's top deputy, Ayman al-Zawahiri, thanked Democrat presidential candidate John Forbes Kerry for the "great ideas he shared during last night's debate."

On the tape, still under analysis by the CIA, Mr. al-Zawahiri notes that Mr. Kerry's debate remarks were a "terrific brainstorming session for our associates who seek targets of opportunity to advance the cause of our peaceful religion."

Mr. Zawahiri said he appreciated the "virtual invitation" implied in the following statements by Mr. Kerry:
-- "The president hasn't put one nickel - not one nickel - into the effort to fix some of our tunnels and bridges and most exposed subway systems."
-- "The president - 95 percent of the containers that come into the ports, right here in Florida, are not inspected."
-- "Civilians get onto aircraft and their luggage is X-rayed, but the cargo hold is not X-rayed.
-- "And there's an enormous undone job to protect the loose nuclear materials in the world that are able to get to terrorists."
-- "The president, also unfortunately, gave in to the chemical industry, which didn't want to do some of the things necessary to strengthen our chemical plant exposure."

Mr. Kerry, a professional Vietnam veteran who is also a U.S. Senator, said "it's important for the global community to understand our vulnerabilities so that we don't appear arrogant, thus inviting a terrorist attack."

http://www.scrappleface.com/
_________________
~ Echo Juliet ~
Altering course to starboard - On Fire, Keep Clear
Navy woman, Navy wife, Navy mother

[Fort Campbell]

a joke about a JOKE


John Kerry meets with the Queen of England. He asks
her, "Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient
government? Are there any tips you can give to me?"

"Well," says the Queen, "the most important thing is
to surround yourself with intelligent people."

Kerry frowns. "But how do I know the people around
me are really intelligent?"

The Queen takes a sip of tea. "Oh, that's easy. You
just ask them to answer an intelligent riddle." The
Queen pushes a button on her intercom. "Please send
Tony Blair in here, would you?"

Tony Blair walks into the room. "Yes, Your Majesty?"

The Queen smiles. "Answer me this, please, Tony.
Your mother and father have a child. It is not your
brother and it is not your sister. Who is it?"

Without pausing for a moment, Tony Blair answers,
"That would be me, Your Majesty."

"Yes! Very good," says the Queen.

Kerry goes back home to ask John Edwards, his vice
presidential choice the same question.

"John. Answer this for me. Your mother and your
father have a child. It's not your brother and it's
not your sister. Who is it?"

"I'm not sure," says John Edwards. "Let me get back
to you on that one."

Edwards goes to his advisors and asks every one, but
none can give him an answer. Finally, he ends up in
the men's room and recognizes Colin Powell's shoes
in the next stall.

Edwards shouts, "Colin! Can you answer this for me?
Your mother and father have a child and it's not
your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Colin Powell yells back, "That's easy. It's me!"

Edwards smiles, and says, "Thanks!"

Then, Edwards goes back to speak with Kerry. "Say, I
did some research and I have the answer to that
riddle. It's Colin Powell"

Kerry gets up, stomps over to John Edwards, and
angrily yells into his face, "No, you idiot! It's
Tony Blair!"[/b]

[The Balloon Artist]

_________________
What about John Kerry's four months in Vietnam qualify him to be president?
Al Gore was there for five.

[Lance_Flatchew]

HeadLine Kerry Throws Ball Faster than any Ball has ever been Thown in an NFL game.

Plane is going 600 mph. Ball is going 5 mph. Combined ground speed 605 mph...
_________________
http://www.tangate.com
Yes, you can lie about your war record. You can lie about spending Christmas in Cambodia. You can lie about ... atrocities of your fellow soldiers. But we are going to nail you on tangate 04.

[Skypilot]

_________________
Please Mr. Kerry Sign Form #180 Now!
Let the truth set you free? NOT!

[The Balloon Artist]

And now with another song

to the tune "I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus"

I spent Christmas in Cambodia
underneath the tracer firelight
They didn’t see me sneak
Up river where it’s deep
They thought that I was down
The Mekong in my bunk asleep
Then
This guy gave me his boonie cap
Underneath the darkened winter night
Oh
what a night for me and crew
if story had just been true
John Kerry in Cambodia that night
_________________
What about John Kerry's four months in Vietnam qualify him to be president?
Al Gore was there for five.

[3rd gen Navy]

Kudos, Sky Pilot.
_________________
Warm Regards,
Sean G. Smith,
RN, BSN, EMT-B, U.S. Navy, 1994 - 2003.
BS Biology, Business Administration, Nursing
The Deal with Life: Make decisions based on what you might gain, not on what you may lose.
!!!!!! LET THE WILD RUMPUS BEGIN !!!!!!