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Kerry's Concession Speech

 
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mcknz
Lt.Jg.


Joined: 15 Aug 2004
Posts: 132
Location: Washington State

PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2004 5:33 am    Post subject: Kerry's Concession Speech Reply with quote

I've been thinking ahead to next Tuesday and I thought I would help write Kerry's concession speech. This is a rough draft:

My fellow Americans, Frenchmen, UN Security Council Members, Foreign Leaders;

I'm John Kerry, and I'm reporting for duty.
I fought in Vietnam.
A few minutes ago I placed a call to President Bush, and after offering my best advice, I conceded the election.
Today the American people have made a great mistake. You have foolishly chosen more of the same. So many foreign leaders had endorsed me because President Bush's foreign policy simply doesn't pass the global test.
President Bush is going to continue his policies of cutting taxes and a strong national defense, and I find this very unfortunate.
I would have done better, because I have a plan.
During this campaign, President Bush repeatedly accused me of being a "flip flopper." I have never flip-flopped. I have never waffled. I have never wavered. I have never melted. I have been consistent. And when I haven't been, it was for the right reasons.
By the way, Dick Cheney has a gay daughter.
As to what I will do now, with the help of my wife, Teresa, we have purchased a small island of the northeast coast. In honor the great wealth we both married into, we have renamed it "Ketchup Island." I am now, and will be from henceforth on, the King of Ketchup Island. There I will spend my time windsurfing, duck hunting, and focusing on the one thing in life that really matters the most - myself.
I would like to give a special thanks to my most ardent supporters - Larry O'Donnell, Dan Rather, Ted Koppel, Kim Jong Il, Yasser Arafat & Fidel Castro. Thank you for all your hard work on my behalf.
In closing, please remember two things. First, I fought in Vietnam, and everyone else who fought their was a war criminal, yet I was a geat hero there. Secondly, Dick Cheney has a gay daughter.
Thank you, and may Santa Clause bring peace to the world in our time.
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GIaunt
Seaman


Joined: 08 Oct 2004
Posts: 174

PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2004 5:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing Laughing Laughing

YESSSSSS!!!!!!
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Wynne
Lieutenant


Joined: 19 Sep 2004
Posts: 228

PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2004 11:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Somebody leak this to the MSM QUICK -- let them fall all over themselves to be the first with the scoop! With any luck, the NYSlimes will run it before the polls close.

Great job, mcknz Laughing
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TRUTH IS ALWAYS THE VICTOR
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1991932
Lance Corporal


Joined: 02 Oct 2004
Posts: 381
Location: Massachusetts

PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2004 2:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's only 10:30 in the morning on the East Coast and it's great to see some of us are dreaming already.

What do Monica Lewinsky and John Kerry have in common?

Don't answer that!

Have a sunny day.

My sympathies to all the Cardinals' fans.
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Former "War Criminal"
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