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BREAKING: Kerry Blames Bush for Moon's Disappearance!

 
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HawkeyeLonewolf
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Joined: 17 Sep 2004
Posts: 69

PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 5:57 pm    Post subject: BREAKING: Kerry Blames Bush for Moon's Disappearance! Reply with quote

KERRY BLAMES BUSH FOR MOON'S DISAPPEARANCE
October 28, 2004

BOSTON -- (Reuters) Presidential Candidate John Kerry today took his campaign on a new tack, blaming President Bush for the disappearance of earth's moon last night.

Earth's moon, traditionally called "the moon," went missing last night for several hours. "The moon, which hangs over Iraq, was clearly there after the president's misguided invasion. Then last night, it wasn't. President Bush failed to properly guard the moon. The moon wasn't even on his list of facilities important enough for even cursory protection."

Kerry continued the assault, "He put the watch of the Moon behind protecting the offices of the Iraqi Oil Ministry."

To the relief of many Kerry supporters, the moon returned to its place in the sky after a few hours of unexplained absence. "Can we be sure it's even the real moon? Perhaps it's a trick by Karl Rove!" Kerry questioned.

"What a relief!" exclaimed DNC Chairman Terry McAuliffe. "After Bush let the moon be taken in such an uncaring fault of leadership, to have it returned safely proves that Kerry can lead America past Bush's mistakes."

Kerry addressed tens of supporters in an Akron, Ohio rally later in the day, "The president is the wrong man if he cannot even keep the moon from being stolen. And the president refuses to accept responsibility for this theft. Instead he chooses to place blame on the alignment of the earth, moon, and sun! He's even coerced NASA into supporting him on his claim. Bush continues to lie to this country."

The supporters cheered and three of them waved in unison their signs bearing the prophetic numeral "6."

Added McAuliffe, "He knows that howling at the moon is a major part of our rallies for this campaign and if he and his advisors think they can derail us by stealing the focus of our worship, they have another think coming!"

The moon could not be reached for comment.


----
©2004 Kevin L. Kitchens, All Rights Reserved
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Tex
Seaman Apprentice


Joined: 16 Sep 2004
Posts: 84

PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 6:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Funny! Laughing
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joeshero
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Joined: 30 Aug 2004
Posts: 321
Location: Midwest

PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 6:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy
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flagreen
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Joined: 10 Sep 2004
Posts: 175

PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 6:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LOL

P.S. On a related note - Dick Cheney's Daughter is a LESBIAN.
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blue9t3
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Joined: 23 Aug 2004
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Location: oregon

PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 6:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote="flagreen"]LOL

P.S. On a related note - Dick Cheney's Daughter is a LESBIAN.[/quote]

And do you know what I did in VietNam?
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Otis
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Joined: 24 Aug 2004
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Location: Bellevue, Washington

PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 6:28 pm    Post subject: Re: BREAKING: Kerry Blames Bush for Moon's Disappearance! Reply with quote

HawkeyeLonewolf wrote:
The moon could not be reached for comment.


According to the New York Times the moon may be back in the sky but - the Man in the Moon remains missing. This is why it cannot be reached for comment. However John Kerry is quoted as saying "I have a plan to return the Man in the Moon back to his rightful place. A vote for me is a vote for the Moon."

As usual the Bush campaign said that senator Kerry is lying. "Mr Kerry has finally gone completely insane. He's basing his campaign on very suspect newspaper stories." A Bush spokeswoman was quoted as saying.
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Hondo
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Joined: 26 Aug 2004
Posts: 423
Location: USA

PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 7:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The term "barking moonbat" comes to mind here . . . .
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oasis
Lieutenant


Joined: 21 Aug 2004
Posts: 201
Location: Florida, want some sun? LoL!

PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 7:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hello,

I guess Kerry would say that because he is a werewolf. Shocked

This guy lives under a full moon 24/7 Twisted Evil

Halloween is a full time job for John impersonating a human that is. Rolling Eyes
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Tobette
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Joined: 31 Aug 2004
Posts: 124
Location: Illinois

PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 8:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Too funny! I hadto e-mail that one out to my Bush Buddies and also to my Kerry-loving sister. It will at least get her to this site without me lecturing her!
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HawkeyeLonewolf
Ensign


Joined: 17 Sep 2004
Posts: 69

PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 9:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tobette wrote:
Too funny! I hadto e-mail that one out to my Bush Buddies and also to my Kerry-loving sister. It will at least get her to this site without me lecturing her!


Glad I could be of service Smile
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MassInd
Seaman


Joined: 11 Aug 2004
Posts: 157

PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 10:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Actually, it was the spirit of Babe Ruth passing in front of it, finally leaving the earth. Very Happy Very Happy
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