BuffaloJack
Master Chief Petty Officer of the Navy
Joined: 10 Aug 2004
Posts: 1637
Location: Buffalo, New York
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 Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 12:48 pm Post subject: Super Kerry Mock |
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I found this posted at Free Republic by Valin
It's actually quite good. Excellect Mock-out of Lurch.
| Quote: | ta-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa, went the the twin engines on John kill em all kerry’s boat (real heros have nick names like that). It was a dark and quiet night, John kill em all Kerry turned to his first mate and (in a quiet yet confident voice) said....”it’s quiet...too quiet I don’t like it.
If only we can get a bit farther up river without getting spotted we’ll be able to drop off secret agent x-183”.
In the blink of an eye the calm of the night was SHATTERED KAPOW KAPOW WOOOOSH BLAM BLAM the night came alive with a song of DEATH! They had sailed into a clever ambush set by Charlie (John kill em all Kerry’s long time foe).
The crew strickened with fear and unable to move turned as one to the one man who had the courage, the skill, the WILL to save them.
John kill em all Kerry like a coiled spring leapped into action (That’s what heros like to do in these kind of situations) with a sneer on his lips John kill em all Kerry THRUST the throttle forward and mzzz teraza (hero’s like john kill em all Kerry like to have names for their boats) LEAPPED like a mighty stallion BAAATTLE STATIONS he shouted! Wakeing as from a dream John kill em all kerry’s band of brothers charged to their stations.
BUDDA BUDDA BUDDA sang the quad 50s in a tune that sang death and destruction for Charlie and his commie stooges, BRRRRAAAAAPPPP the 60’s spat out a curtain of lead, BOOOOM BOOOOM the 300mm mortars adding their song to the aria of war!
Now the dirty commies would pay for DARING to attack John killl em all Kerry and his All American band of brothes! With a ferral grin John kill em all Kerry shouted DIE COMMIE SCUM! (see hero types like John kill em all Kerry say things like that, they teach them that at hero school).
Just when it looked like one more (glorious) victory for John kill em all Kerry and his gallant band of brothers, KABOOOOM commie frogmen had placed a mine (the sneeky dirty underhanded Khmer rouge bast*rds) on the sleak and deadly mzzz teraza! In a bat of an eyelash john kill em all Kerry knew his gallant little steed was done for,
Flinging the little mzzz teraza at the nearest nest of vipers John kill em all Kerry CHARGED straight into the muzzels of death.
Afraid? Not he, John kill em all Kerry didn’t know the meaning of fear
{fear(Function): noun Etymology: Middle English fer,
from Old English f[AE]r sudden danger; akin to Latin periculum attempt, peril, Greek peiran to attempt
Date: 12th century
1 a : an unpleasant often strong emotion caused by anticipation or awareness of danger
b (1) : an instance of this emotion
(2) : a state marked by this emotion
2 : anxious concern :
SOLICITUDE
3 : profound reverence and awe especially toward God
4 : reason for alarm : DANGER synonyms FEAR, DREAD, FRIGHT, ALARM, PANIC, TERROR, TREPIDATION mean painful agitation in the presence or anticipation of danger. FEAR is the most general term and implies anxiety and usually loss of courage .
DREAD usually adds the idea of intense reluctance to face or meet a person or situation and suggests aversion as well as anxiety .
FRIGHT implies the shock of sudden, startling fear .
ALARM suggests a sudden and intense awareness of immediate danger .
PANIC implies unreasoning and overmastering fear causing hysterical activity .
TERROR implies the most extreme degree of fear.
TREPIDATION adds to DREAD the implications of timidity, trembling, and hesitation.}
The boat rammed into the den of inequity, and leapping from the galllant but doomed craft a 50cal in his right hand his (trusty) M-16 in his left a 5in. cannon strapped to his back John kill em all Kerry LEAPPED into the very heart of the enemy AAAAHHHHHH he cried all the while dealing death to the left and right (hero types do stuff like that all the time, that’s why they’re hero types)
The (dirty) commies quaked in fear at this (magnificent specimen) All American hero type in a blood lust cried “It’s kill em all Kerry! Please don’t kill us, John kill em all Kerry would have none of that! Not after their dastardly attack and mortal wounding of his (beloved) mzzz teraza, DIE YOU DIRTY COOMIS RATS, I’LL TEACH YOU TO MESS WITH MASSACHUSETTS!
And oh the carnage the ensued, So terrible was his (awesome but sensitive) wrath that soon after those above him (being jealous of his superior combat skills and the love his band of brothers had for him) sent him back to the good old US of A.
Stay tuned for more advetures of John kill em all Kerry. |
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/1858743/posts?page=7
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Swift Boats - Qui Nhon (12/69-4/70), Cat Lo (4/70-5/70), Vung Tau (5/70-12/71) |
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