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W stands for RONG & F stands for what?

 
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Nomorelies
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Joined: 11 Aug 2004
Posts: 977
Location: Texas

PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 12:57 am    Post subject: W stands for RONG & F stands for what? Reply with quote

What genius lurks in the smoke filled backrooms of the John F. Kerry Campaign headquarters? A devasting strategy was just hatched. (thanks to Paul Begala and James Carville). Since Kerry cannot talk about two Americas after the RNC convention, his new campaign theme will be "alphabet soup"...... surely a punishing blow against George W. Bush.

During the inaugaral launch of his new campaign speech, we hear that " W" stands for RONG 38 times in a row. Now that's catchey! [did not dare to use the waffle word"]

I am very impressed with the creativity of the Swiftvets who know exactly what "F" stands for. Is it Fraud? Is it Foney? Is it Flip-Flop? Do you have any better ideas before admin moves this over go Geedunk Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy
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Last edited by Nomorelies on Tue Sep 07, 2004 1:00 am; edited 1 time in total
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Me#1You#10
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Joined: 06 May 2004
Posts: 6503

PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 1:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quit dissin' Geedunk like it's some kind of purgatory Wink

There's some good chatter going on 'round the coffee pot!
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Nomorelies
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 1:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You got it. Embarassed
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msindependent
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Joined: 26 Aug 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 1:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Freaking - I can't use the word I'd like to.
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rb325th
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Joined: 21 Aug 2004
Posts: 1334

PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 1:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Fraudulent
Now where do we think this topic is moving?
Hi Ho, Hi Ho it's off to Geedunk we go
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Navy_Navy_Navy
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Joined: 07 May 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 1:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Freakshow
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Nomorelies
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 1:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I told you so!

Razz
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DevilDon
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Joined: 16 May 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 2:49 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

No need to knock Geedunk, I've recently started coming here if I'm in the mood for something different. Lots of good stuff here too.
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DevilDon
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Joined: 16 May 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 2:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh "Faltering" like his campaign.
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HOV1
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Joined: 23 Aug 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 3:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Flatulent, like the hot air that blows out of his... mouth when he talks Embarassed
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TruthCanHurt
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Joined: 25 Aug 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 8:49 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Someone else posted in another thread....

FUBAR
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Knighthawk
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Joined: 11 Aug 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 9:20 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

As my wise and learned Grandma from Alabama use to say,

Flat lyin' cur dog."
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USAF66-70
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Joined: 26 Aug 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 12:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

fellatio?
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arymann
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Joined: 24 Aug 2004
Posts: 269
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 11:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This is a great satire piece.

My favorite quote:
Quote:

Finally, one day after Kerry told a rally that "W stands for wrong," Bush responded, "W stands for wright."

http://msnbc.msn.com/id/5934691/site/newsweek/

Quote:
Kerry Changes Tie
Heeding calls for a shake-up, the challenger hopes his new cravat will close the gap with BushWEB EXCLUSIVE
By Andy Borowitz
Newsweek
Updated: 5:00 p.m. ET Sept. 7, 2004Sept. 7 - Responding to calls from Democratic Party insiders to shake up his listless campaign for president, Sen. John Kerry (D-Mass) today changed his tie. According to those in Kerry's inner circle, the senator believes that his new neckwear could close the widening gap in the polls between him and President George W. Bush.

"Bush got a nice bounce coming out of his convention," Kerry reportedly told his campaign aides, "but just wait 'til the voters get a load of this new tie!" The new cravat, a satin and twill model from Brooks Brothers, will replace his old one, a classic repp tie, also from Brooks Brothers.

Some Democratic insiders were harshly critical of Kerry's decision to change ties, arguing that the move fell far short of the wholesale shake-up they had been hoping for. Heightening their concern was the Kerry campaign's decision not to debut the new tie with a nationwide media blitz but rather to roll it out cautiously in selected battleground states over the next few weeks. "If you don't live in Ohio or Michigan you will not even know that John Kerry has a new tie," groused one insider.

In other news from the Democratic ticket, vice-presidential nominee John Edwards today confirmed that he had become invisible and would remain so for the duration of the campaign. In a press conference in Davenport, Iowa, the disembodied voice of Edwards vowed to use his powers of invisibility "for good, not evil."

Finally, one day after Kerry told a rally that "W stands for wrong," Bush responded, "W stands for wright."

Andy Borowitz is the author of The Borowitz Report, and the winner of the National Press Club's humor award. For more, go to www.borowitzreport.com.
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