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Kimmymac Master Chief Petty Officer
Joined: 01 Sep 2004 Posts: 816 Location: Texas
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Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 7:16 am Post subject: Friendly Advice for Bush Haters |
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I am offering this *friendly* advice to the screaming, squirming, spiteful, writhing, hand-wringing, permanently offended, completely clueless, habitually obnoxious, George W. Bush hating, free lunch wanting, class envious, pit-e-full leftists out there. You know who you are. If not, I offer you this fool-proof tip sure to lead to greater self-awareness (I know how into self-anything you folks are!) If you look in the mirror and this is what you see: , you fit the above profile.
If you look in the mirror and you can not see ANY reflection, you are John Kerry, and as such, you do not, technically, exist. Oh, I know you think you exist, but come November 2 you will see what I mean.
But anyway, now that I have helped you unlock the portal to your own sef-awareness and you have gotten in touch with your inner I offer you the following friendly advice: Double up on your anti-depressants NOW! Do NOT wait until November 2nd. You may not be aware that anti-depressants take at least 6 weeks in the blood stream before they become effective, and boys and girls, or s and s, you know what that means: it means a rough road ahead for the Bush haters.
HELP IS ON THE WAY in the form 4 MORE YEARS for those of us Republicans, but for you people it will mean a trip to your friends, Mr. Doctor and Miss Pharmacy Tech.
Depression is a serious problem and can lead to destructive, and even criminal behavior. If you or anyone you know has one or more of these symptoms, SEEK HELP IMMEDIATELY!
*commiting forgery
*self-aggrandizing (such as pretending to be a war hero)
*total inability to deal with reality
*Over-eating
*pathological lying
*paranoia (such as imagining pajama clad bloggers have hacked into your PC, have tapped your phone lines or can read your thoughts)
*obsession with Karl Rove
Don't be a VICTIM! Regardless of how much you enjoy it! SEEK HELP!
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This message brought to you by Paxatrinloft: where better living through chemicals begins.
Last edited by Kimmymac on Sun Sep 19, 2004 7:33 am; edited 1 time in total |
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Mastour Seaman Recruit
Joined: 26 Aug 2004 Posts: 32
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Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 7:27 am Post subject: Let's be careful |
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I've been taking the cautious approach here and although I want to agree with your sentiment, I think we need to continue with a watch and wait mentality. There is too much time and too many things can happen between now and Nov 2. I don't trust the MSM or the DNC and have no doubt they have something up their collective sleeves.
I suggest a NO GLOAT policy until we know the outcome on Nov 3. _________________ Everybody has their own truth. The facts are what matter and you can't fudge the facts! |
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dmackto Rear Admiral
Joined: 03 Sep 2004 Posts: 719 Location: Florida
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Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 7:29 am Post subject: Re: Friendly Advice for Bush Haters |
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Kimmymac wrote: | I am offering this *friendly* advice to the screaming, squirming, spiteful, writhing, hand-wringing, permanently offended, completly clueless, habitually obnoxious, George W. Bush hating, free lunch wanting, class envious, pit-e-full leftists out there. You know who you are. If not, I offer you this fool-proof tip sure to lead to self-awareness (I know how into self-anything you folks are!) If you look in the mirror and this is what you see: you fit the above profile. If you look in the mirror and you can not see ANY reflection, you are John Kerry, and as such you do not, technically, exist. Oh, I know you think you exist, but come November 2 you will see what I mean.
But anyway, now that I have helped you unlock the portal to your own sef-awareness and you have gotten in touch with your inner I offer you the following friendly advice: Double up on your anti-depressants NOW! Do NOT wait until November 2nd. It is a well known fact that anti-depressants take at least 6 weeks in the blood stream before they become effective, and boy and girls, or s and s, you know what that means. HELP IS ON THE WAY in the form 4 MORE YEARS for those of us Republicans, but for you people it will mean a trip to your friends, Mr. Doctor and Miss Pharmacy Tech.
Depression is a serious problem and can lead to destructive and even criminal behavior. These behaviors can manifest in commiting forgery, self-aggrandizing (such as pretending to be a war hero) and a total inability to deal with reality (the entire Democratic party, with the exception of Zell Miller) Over eating is another symptom of depression, and I guess we all know which "documentarian" is currently involved in digging his own grave with his own fork.
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This message brought to you by Paxatrinloft, where better living through chemicals begins. |
You ALMOST got me on that one but I was ready and thwarted the attempt. _________________ Deborah
The FROZEN CHICKEN Journal
This is no time for ease and comfort. It is the time to dare and endure.
- Winston Churchill |
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Kimmymac Master Chief Petty Officer
Joined: 01 Sep 2004 Posts: 816 Location: Texas
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Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 7:34 am Post subject: |
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DARN!
And who is gloating, Mastour? I am offering advice. Friendly advice. Plus I have some pharm stocks, and momma needs a new pair of shoes, if you know what I mean. |
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a6502 Ensign
Joined: 13 Sep 2004 Posts: 64
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Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 8:37 am Post subject: |
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I would suggest that you add some stock in Kool-Aide, waffles, and fertilizer after the election when the price bottoms.
(That was not a gloat, just sound financial advice!)
Of course, those folks that you describe just don't see it that way, so offering advice to them is like screaming into a vaccum - lots of effort, but no real noise.
What you should offer is a Cosmo like questionnaire:
1) Have you ever marched in a 'rally'?
If yes, did you know what the rally was for?
2) Have you ever had an opinion on something that was none of your business?
3) Have you ever had an opinion on something that you did not understand?
4) What causes global warming:
a) Bad chemicals created by evil corporations for greedy Americans.
b) The sun.
Etc...
You could have LOTS of fun, especially if you hand it out... |
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Chuck Z Ombie AC2000 LCDR
Joined: 19 Aug 2004 Posts: 426 Location: Northern New Jersey
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Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 8:52 am Post subject: |
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I expect a lot of false accusations from Kerry in the debates and even though the president will try to refute all of them he probably will miss one or two. The press will eat them up saying the president lost to a 'great' debater John Kerry. then the last month i bet every Kittey Kelley talking point will be exploited, the 'mistress' Bush supposedly had. A 'witness' to Bush taking drugs will surface days before the election. THe list of tabloid gossip is endless.
The most aggravating thing about the MSM is they refuse to give the president any headlines without refuting everything he says with a slant and promoting Kerry. The AP is so guilty of doing this and they are carried by every news service including Fox. They are no better than CBS and nobody calls them on it. _________________ John Kerry, R.I.P. (Rot In Paris) |
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Stevie Master Chief Petty Officer of the Navy
Joined: 25 Aug 2004 Posts: 1451 Location: Queen Creek, Arizona
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Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 10:20 am Post subject: Re: Friendly Advice for Bush Haters |
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[quote="Kimmymac"]I am offering this *friendly* advice to the screaming, squirming, spiteful, writhing, hand-wringing, permanently offended, completely clueless, habitually obnoxious, George W. Bush hating, free lunch wanting, class envious, pit-e-full leftists out there. You know who you are. If not, I offer you this fool-proof tip sure to lead to greater self-awareness (I know how into self-anything you folks are!) If you look in the mirror and this is what you see: , you fit the above profile.
you should send this post to the Fox Beltway boys.... the one whose name I can't remember just asked the other (mort) what the bush haters were going to do if come 11/2 bush wins inspite of all their parties and hate etc.... and Mort even suggested Paxil, effexor etc.... !
so funny! _________________ Stevie
Congressmen who willfully take actions during wartime that damage
morale and undermine the military are saboteurs and should
be arrested, exiled or hanged. |
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CTW Rear Admiral
Joined: 10 Sep 2004 Posts: 691
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Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 12:54 pm Post subject: |
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kimmymac, Great suggestions! I get such a kick from your posts.
God Bless you and your family. Your son is in my prayers. Please tell him for me he's a hero and his service is noble.
Remember the BIG RED ONE in Samara.
Never Ever Kerry |
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Nomorelies Vice Admiral
Joined: 11 Aug 2004 Posts: 977 Location: Texas
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Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 2:11 pm Post subject: |
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Kinnimac:
Excellent post. A clever read. _________________ Nomorelies Make a donation HERE |
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Sisku Hanne Seaman Recruit
Joined: 15 Aug 2004 Posts: 47
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Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 6:33 pm Post subject: |
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Maybe someone should start offering "Kerry survival kits". Suggested contents: a box of waffles, a pair of flip-flops, some bandaids, a few packs of Kool-aid, some Kava tea (anti-anxiety), some St. John's Wort (anti-depression), an anger-management tape, a coupon for Wendy's (where the common folk eat), and a crying towel.
All arranged in a nice little basket! I tell ya, they would sell like hotcakes! |
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