SwiftVets.com

[redneckvet]

A man in a hot air ballon realized he was lost. He lowered his altitude and spotted a man in boat below. He shouted to him "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am." The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air ballon approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude. " The balloonist rolled his eyes and said, "You must be a republican". He replied, "I am. How did you know?" "Well" answered the balloonist," every thing you have told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with your information, and I am still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me." The man smiled and said, "you must be a democrat." "I am, replied the balloonist." How did you know? "Well", said the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you are going. You've risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expecct me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow it's my fault."
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"Full Tour Grunt"