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Son of a VET
Master Chief Petty Officer
Joined: 07 Aug 2004
Posts: 791
Location: TN
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 Posted: Tue Oct 05, 2004 11:44 pm Post subject: Michael Moore illegally offered underwear in exchange for vo |
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Michael Moore illegally offered underwear in exchange for voting
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State GOP says Michael Moore illegally offered underwear in exchange for voting
October 5, 2004, 6:19 PM
LANSING, Mich. (AP) -- The Michigan Republican Party is asking four county prosecutors to file charges against filmmaker Michael Moore, charging that he illegally offered underwear, noodles and snacks to college students in exchange for their promise to vote.
"We want everyone to participate in this year's election, but not because they were bribed or coerced by the likes of Michael Moore," said Greg McNeilly, executive director of the state Republican Party.
The GOP said it asked prosecutors in Wayne, Ingham, Antrim and Isabella counties to charge Moore with violating Michigan's election law. The law prohibits a person from contracting with another for something of value in exchange for agreeing to vote.
Moore, a native of Flint, is touring the country and imploring "slackers" who usually don't vote to head to the polls this year, saying they could make the difference in the presidential race.
He made stops at Michigan State University, the University of Michigan-Dearborn, Central Michigan University and Elk Rapids High School on the first leg of a 60-city pre-election tour.
During each program, habitual nonvoters are invited on stage to pledge to vote for Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry. First-time student voters are offered gag prizes such as clean underwear.
The GOP said Moore also offered students a clean dorm room, a year's supply of Tostitos and a package of Ramen noodles.
Maria Miller, a spokeswoman for the Wayne County prosecutor's office, refused to comment on the matter. Calls to Moore and the other county prosecutors weren't immediately returned Tuesday.
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On the Net:
Michigan Republican Party, http://www.migop.org
Michael Moore, http://www.michaelmoore.com
Poll: Michigan voters want a say on gaming
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Edwards to stop in Royal Oak; Bush will lead rally at OCC
When the defendant is poor, who pays? Supreme Court to decide Michigan case
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http://www.freep.com/news/statewire/sw105215_20041005.htm
I hope they throw his azz in jail!!! 
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Son of a VET
Master Chief Petty Officer
Joined: 07 Aug 2004
Posts: 791
Location: TN
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| Posted: Wed Oct 06, 2004 9:29 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: | Republicans, Out of Ideas, Ask Prosecutors to Arrest Michael Moore
10/6/04
Dear Friends,
You may have heard by now that the Michigan Republican Party has called for my arrest. That’s right. They literally want me brought up on charges—and hope that I’m locked up.
No, I’m not kidding. The Republican Party, yesterday, filed a criminal complaint with the prosecutors in each of the counties where I spoke last week in Michigan.
My crime? Clean underwear for anyone who will vote in the upcoming election.
Each night on our 60-city “Slacker Uprising Tour” through the 20 battleground states, I’ve been registering hundreds (and on some nights, thousands) of voters at my arena and stadium events. I then ask for everyone over 23 who has never voted (or didn’t vote in the last election) to stand up. I tell these slackers that I understand and respect why they think politicians are not worth the bother. I tell them that I may have been the original slacker, and that I do not want them to change their slacker ways. Keep sleeping ‘til noon! Keep drinking beer! Stay on the sofa and watch as much TV as possible! But, please, just for me, on 11/2, I want you to leave the house and give voting a try—just this once. The stakes this time are just too high.
If they promise me that they’ll do this, I give the guys a 3-pack of new Fruit of the Loom underwear, and the women get a day’s supply of Ramen noodles, the sustenance of slackers everywhere.
I then close by having them repeat the 2004 Slacker Oath: “Pick nose! Pick butt! Pick Kerry.”
It seems to have worked, as each night the volunteer tables are swamped afterwards with hundreds of new and young voters signing up to campaign for regime change for the next four weeks.
The satire of all this seems to have been lost on the Republicans. Or maybe it hasn’t. The state of Michigan (where we spent most of last week) reported that over 100,000 young people recently registered to vote, a record that no one saw coming. The Slacker Tour has turned into a huge steamroller with a momentum all its own.
So, the Republican Party, to show their gratitude that so many young people will now be involved in our system, has demanded that I be sent to jail for trying to “bribe” students to vote.
Of course, this would be quite laughable if they weren’t so serious about their charges. But they are. I may soon be a wanted man in Michigan—simply because I convinced a few slackers to change their underwear and eat a healthy meal of artificially flavored noodles.
I thought I’d seen it all this year—Disney refusing to distribute the film they paid for, right-wingers harassing theater owners who showed “Fahrenheit 9/11,” conservative action groups trying to get the FEC to kick our film ads off the air, the unnecessary restrictive R-rating that forced teenagers to sneak in to see it, and all the stupid, crazy attacks on me and my movie that I’ve had to listen to as I watched the public ignore them and pack the movie houses anyway, where my film was being shown. And when all that failed, five different Republican groups made five different attack dog tapes (oops, “documentaries”!) against me in a period of about six weeks. But they were all so bad, so boring, so right-wing, no one wanted to watch them and they too went away, a sad waste of good videotape.
Now, after enduring all this, with no tricks left in their bag, they’ve just decided, “Let’s toss his sorry ass behind bars—him and his noodles and his gift of clean underwear!”
My friends, they will not catch me. Though I may be on the run, and I may never be able to return home to my beloved Michigan, I make this solemn vow to you and yours: The slackers of America shall not be denied their noodles, they will proudly wear their clean underwear as free Americans, and they will vote Bush out of office come November 2nd (though they will not show up to the polls until well after noon)!
Stay strong, stay slacker, and please remember to turn the underwear inside out every three days. As for the noodles, add boiling water, stir.
Yours,
Michael Moore
MMFlint@aol.com
www.michaelmoore.com
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Kimmymac
Master Chief Petty Officer
Joined: 01 Sep 2004
Posts: 816
Location: Texas
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| Posted: Wed Oct 06, 2004 9:45 pm Post subject: |
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LOL! LOL LOL--this is why I come to this site. Cutting edge info and analysis. And Michael Moore updates.
Nuh uh, this did NOT happen. Come on: clean underwear and top ramen for votes... Americans are SO cheap! Terrorists will pay hundreds of thousands of dollars to the families of homicide bombers, and all Mikey Moore can offer is free underwear and cheap noodles to elect one of the top abetters of terror...
I am John Kerry, and I stand for clean underpants for all stoned slackers, and a clump of artificially colored noodles in every pot!
Slackers for Kerry! Fat slobs for clean underwear! Lazy, Worthless Oxygen Thieves United Against Bush! Woo hooooo, that's impressive!
What next?
We are so "desparate" we are now resorting to enforcing the law to *get* Mikey Poo-poo <still laughing>
Bribery. Retarded bribery, but bribery noetheless, and **we** are desparate?
Oh man, these people are better than cable television! 
Michael Moore is going to have a massive coronary as a direct result of his embrace of the "slacker" lifestyle he advocates, btw. I will not shed a single tear, however. |
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Son of a VET
Master Chief Petty Officer
Joined: 07 Aug 2004
Posts: 791
Location: TN
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| Posted: Wed Oct 06, 2004 9:48 pm Post subject: |
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It would be SOOO funny to see MM go to jail and be someones "girlfried". I would love to see him make a movie about jail house love. 
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Hondo
LCDR
Joined: 26 Aug 2004
Posts: 423
Location: USA
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| Posted: Wed Oct 06, 2004 10:55 pm Post subject: |
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Nah, he probably won't end up in jail. But it might at least cost "Mikey" some time and $$$ in legal fees!
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"War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things: the decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks nothing worth a war, is worse."
-- John Stuart Mill |
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JCBoston
Seaman
Joined: 31 Aug 2004
Posts: 185
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| Posted: Wed Oct 06, 2004 10:56 pm Post subject: |
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The real question here is who's underwear?
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"Today we did what we had to do. They counted on America to be passive. They counted wrong."~Ronald Reagan |
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shadowy
Commander
Joined: 26 Aug 2004
Posts: 301
Location: St. Louis, MO
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| Posted: Thu Oct 07, 2004 2:39 am Post subject: |
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| How flattering to his audience to have him assume they are like him, in constant need of clean underwear and moore food. |
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